Sunday, 29 November 2009

A Three Hour Tour

I tried making vegetable and barley risotto yesterday with portobello steaks. I accidentally bought wheat berries. Did you know that making risotto out of wheat berries takes approximately two hundred hours? Neither did I, until I served my boyfriend dinner just in time to watch SNL. In the meantime:

- My roommate watched a movie "with several breaks."
- My boyfriend designed a website.
- Someone arrived, unpacked, and moved in across the street.
- I sang the entire cast albums of A Little Night Music, Company, and Follies.
- I fogged up the apartment until everything condensed and it began to rain indoors.
- I ate two bowls of cereal because I was too hungry to wait for dinner.
- I washed dishes three times.
- I started to hallucinate in the sweat lodge I'd created over the stove.

I sort of resent any meal that takes so long that it would have been easier to work at minimum wage for a fraction of the time and just buy the stupid thing myself. It was kind of good, though.


Anyhoo said...

Really daft question, but what are wheat berries? Are they more berry or more wheat?

Ryan said...

More wheat. I have no idea how wheat works, but they're kernelesque.

Anyhoo said...

So you tried making risotto from the equivalent of unpopped popcorn*? You clearly have your boyfriend well trained.

* It was that or some weak pun on 'kernelesque', but I figure if the person telling the joke has to Google the command structure of the army then maybe it's not such a good joke.