Sunday 29 November 2009

A Three Hour Tour

I tried making vegetable and barley risotto yesterday with portobello steaks. I accidentally bought wheat berries. Did you know that making risotto out of wheat berries takes approximately two hundred hours? Neither did I, until I served my boyfriend dinner just in time to watch SNL. In the meantime:

- My roommate watched a movie "with several breaks."
- My boyfriend designed a website.
- Someone arrived, unpacked, and moved in across the street.
- I sang the entire cast albums of A Little Night Music, Company, and Follies.
- I fogged up the apartment until everything condensed and it began to rain indoors.
- I ate two bowls of cereal because I was too hungry to wait for dinner.
- I washed dishes three times.
- I started to hallucinate in the sweat lodge I'd created over the stove.

I sort of resent any meal that takes so long that it would have been easier to work at minimum wage for a fraction of the time and just buy the stupid thing myself. It was kind of good, though.

3 comments:

Anyhoo said...

Really daft question, but what are wheat berries? Are they more berry or more wheat?

Ryan said...

More wheat. I have no idea how wheat works, but they're kernelesque.

Anyhoo said...

So you tried making risotto from the equivalent of unpopped popcorn*? You clearly have your boyfriend well trained.

* It was that or some weak pun on 'kernelesque', but I figure if the person telling the joke has to Google the command structure of the army then maybe it's not such a good joke.